Spring training is just around the corner, but we need to get the Super Bowl out of the way first. The Carolina Panthers are facing the Denver Broncos in what will surely be a great game, but Rick Rowand thinks some people are focused on the wrong thing.
It’s Sol 12. Just two more Sols to go. With any decent luck we’ll all make it to the game without any more unfortunate incidents.
But, I’m at a bit of a loss here. It still mystifies me that sportswriters and broadcasters feel the need to do the same thing every year. I mean, you’re out in Super Bowl City presented by Verizon. This time in San Francisco. On the company dime. Eating at fantastic restaurants. Going to cocktail parties. Hobnobbing with the rich and famous. And you’re getting paid! Who in their right mind is gonna complain about that?
I’ve had it up to here, people! We’ve all had it up to here! Haven’t you writers and TV people anything better to do? It’s not like every other sport in the world shuts down for two weeks: There’s been some big tennis thing down in Australia. Players are still getting signed and traded in baseball. They are playing fútbol all over the world. It was National Signing Day in college football Wednesday and NBA and NCAA basketball is on Sportscenter every frickin’ night. There are other sports to pay attention to. Oh, and hockey.
We have two weeks between the championship games for a reason: Corporate America demands it. Deal with it, you ingrates! Now, before all of you start moaning into your microbrews or espresso macchiatos while switching between the latest Springsteen reissue on your iPhones, just stop and think for a minute, and for God’s sake stop writing about how you’re forced to deal with all of the hype. We don’t care. Your kids don’t care. Even your mother doesn’t care.
I do realize that some of you are forced into these “there’s too much hype” types of stories by your editors, those bastards (Editor’s Note: This editor doesn’t agree with the author’s characterization of editors). You aren’t the ones I’m directing this at. Nope. It’s all you other people who think you are breaking new ground by being “the voice of the people” by complaining about the two weeks of hype. Guess what? You aren’t. What you are doing is the same thing that scores of others have already done. Even ESPN, the “Worldwide Leader” in hyping the NFL, admits that there’s too much hype. And if you’re behind ESPN on the curve on this, then you are still listening to disco and rocking a mullet. Frankie left Hollywood long ago.
The marketing people know what we want and it’s your job to deliver it to us, the people at home who have to watch the game on our suddenly inferior 55” HDTVs. Do your jobs! Have you ever stopped to think that maybe, just maybe, America wants to know what color of socks and shoes Cam Newton will be wearing on his trip to the game? Some of us want to see a compilation of all the dumb questions the players get asked on media day. We need to know which watered down beer will best wash down that chain store pizza. For some people, the commercials are the best part of the game, you know, not everyone likes the game. Think back, how many of the 49 have actually been good games?
You know what everyone who isn’t a fan of Denver or Charlotte is doing right now? The regular fan is hoping he or she remembers to bring enough ones or fives to fill out the squares at the party. We’re also hoping that someone else remembered to bring the five layer dip because it’s a pain in the ass to make. The rest of us are bringing wings or chips and salsa.
And speaking of Charlotte, what’s the mayor of Charlotte going to bet the mayor of Denver? At least the mayor of Denver can bet a to-go container of Rocky Mountain Oysters. Maybe the Denver mayor can get a tour of the main vault at Bank of America.
That’s what the rest of America cares about. Not how many parties with open bars you were forced to go to and how sleep deprived you are.
Rick Rowand has written about Boston’s young stars, David Ortiz’s career, Brock Holt’s aura, and a breakdown of a huge signing.
Follow Rick on Twitter @rrowand.